Updated: Dec 12, 2022
Change happens when you are uncomfortable
Some of my most profound changes happened when I've been knee-deep in sh*t. Every time I've stood staring adversity in the face is when I've made the decision to change. Some of the most powerful moments in my life have been on the back of negativity.
There was never a happy, comfortable moment in my life when I felt the need to make changes.
Should you see the positive in everything?
Give me a ££ for each time somebody said to me during those dark times, "Think Positive", and I'd be a wealthy man now. When you're low, knackered and struggling to get out of bed, most people think that 'positivity' is where it's at. Alas, some things aren't positive - fact.
And asking someone, "What's the positive in this?" when they feel that their life is falling apart - you can see the trouble they might have here.
But 'thinking positive' is what mindset is all about, isn't it, Ben? Oh no... We can all look at things in more 'helpful' ways, and there's usually a better way to think about something.
But needing to be positive about everything can cause more harm than good.
It's like going to the fridge to get the milk for your coffee and finding out that the kids have finished it. And then putting it back with a big smiley face drawn on it. > It's still empty, your coffee's still black, and you're still p*ssed off. So rather than asking yourself, "What's positive in this?" when you've had a crap day. It starts with accepting that there will be good and bad in your reality. No one goes through life without good things and bad things happening.
And no one goes through life without negative thoughts.
How to use your thoughts
But rather than seeing them as some terrible soul-destroying thing.
Why not use them as a guide?
A warning shot that you are redlining and need to make a change. That way, your thoughts help, not hinder. And in all honesty, searching for the positives in everything is disempowering. Think about it... You're searching for a lie; they are not there... Whereas accepting your reality = Very empowering You're taking full responsibility for your feelings and any changes you need to make. >Sad >Anger >Depression >Worry >Frustration
What if you took these feelings and used them to empower yourself?
Ben Yates is a Health, Fitness and Life Coach based in Hinckley, Leicestershire.
If you want to create an extraordinary healthy life – with strength and energy – come join ProjectU for the next 3 months. Where ever you are in the country, I'll help you absolutely transform your life. You’re taking zero risk! If you haven’t reached our mutually agreed goal within 90 days, I will personally reimburse you every single penny *T&Cs Apply.